For those of you joining us from Mama Kat's know that I decided to change this prompt a little bit because I am recently returned from a little mini break with the fam. And although I feel I have learned many things in my short life about love, dating, marriage and kids; none of those lessons prepared me for a road trip through Iowa crammed into the blue-minivan-from-hell that was stacked to the rafters with four adults (two of which were my in-laws), three kids (one of them is autistic and all of them, five years-old and under), and all of the stuff one needs when leaving town for a four-day-weekend. Here's my list of the "Top 10 Things I Learned NOT to Ask While
Trapped in a Slow Moving, Blue, Sanitarium on Wheels.
- What is that smell? (And can we turn the "air" off so that it stops recirculating it's foulness anew every few minutes?)
- Is the interstate closed? (And will some evil befall us if we dare use it?)
- Who said cheese flavored chips and a glass of lemonade was a balanced meal?
- Why am I solely responsible for packing everything everyone is going to need in every conceivable circumstance?
- You think this rest stop is sexy? (Are you kidding me? No. I did not know that a quickie at a rest stop was the road trip version of the Mile High Club.)
- Why are men completely unable to make the DVD player work? (Even though it was working just fine before we stopped for the sixth pit stop in the past four hours,)
- How slow do we have to drive before we are actually breaking the law?
- Why is it called a vacation when I'm still doing the exact same things I always do; except without the convenience of being at home?
- If the restaurant's restroom is that filthy, have we thought about what the kitchen looks like?
- How do I convince my daughter that "Juan, Jacob, Jiggle-hammer, Smurf!" are not the words to that song?
And as always (on Thursdays) this post was inspired by Mama Kat's Pretty Much World Famous Writing Workshop!
