"Scout Leader" From Hell

I was instructed to write this.
These opinion may not be my own.
You've been warned

     So APPARENTLY my daughter has a Daisy Scout meeting today after school. I wasn't notified of said meeting until about 11:00 last night. Probably because the "Scout Leader" decided to pawn off the duties of notifying the parents to her assistant, whose email was declared SPAM by my Yahoo email provider. So that means I've spent the majority of my morning trying to find all of our scouting gear and ironing on all of the patches that I was supposed to do (and didn't) when they were awarded.

     Let me tell you a little about our "Scout Leader". She's your typical Mommy nightmare; a blond bombshell with a rack that won't quit. If Martha Stewart and Pam Anderson were to have a love child that would be my daughter's "Scout Leader". Like I said, your worst nightmare.

Don't you just hate this bitch?

     She is often calling or emailing last minute info that sends my life into a tailspin. 
  • You need snacks for 20 starving, allergy prone girls in an hour? GREAT!
  • Myriam needs a 4 foot paper mache bust of the Girl Scout founder, Juliette Gordon, by tomorrow? OK!
  • You need a place to store 5000 boxes of cookies? Of course you can use my garage! I don't need to park there or anything. (Oh wait. That one actually happened....)

Someone please remind me why my child needs socialized?
*Disclaimer: The Mommy admits that none of the above is true. Except for learning about today's meeting at 11 PM the night before. And that the "Scout Leader" has a killer rack. (She's paying me to say that.)
The "Scout Leader" and I exchanged some hilarious IMs back and forth last night and it prompted this little piece of satire. (She really just wants featured on the blog; she's needy like that.)

**Also, I have MAD Photoshop skills! The above picture is not a good example of that fact and was only made to be funny. (I can do a much better job. If I want to. Or am paid to....)

Peace Out!

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All images and written work, found herein, is the sole property of Rebecca Burton and may not be used in any capacity without express written consent.